Sunday, November 21, 2010
Ambition
I'm not sure of the reason, but these past couple weeks, I've been finding it hard to stay motivated. (And this isn't a complaint, merely an observation). Seeing as how I have a lot of work to do in the next couple of weeks, I was wondering what you people do to stay motivated? What keeps you going? What inspires you to do well?
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Motivation is a difficult thing. I take the Existentialist position put forth by Sartre when he says that the Me from a few minutes ago is not the same Me that is currently typing this message now.
What that means, essentially, is that I have to keep affirming decisions that I have made in the past. He uses an example about a gambler who, weeks ago, made the decision to stop gambling and came up with many good reasons to do so (family, employment, finances, etc.)
But when the gambler is confronted with the opportunity to gamble again, he feels vertigo. This means that he knows that, despite what he has decided weeks ago and all the logical reasons of the past mean absolutely nothing and he could just as easily start gambling again. The past becomes mere fact and the power it holds is only given by me. At every crossroads where the decision to uphold or abandon what I have sworn to do must be confirmed by me, now, in the present.
Another example is Kierkegaard's repetition. At every moment in the present we must continue to say yes to what we are doing.
To tie this to motivation (thought it is easy to see how it is related) I feel the same vertigo as the gambler. I tell myself many of the same reasons you hear every day: I want to finish my degree with high marks, I am passionate about the subject ergo I should study hard, I want to impress my peers, I want to improve, etc.
All of these reasons are legitimate. However, the decision I made two days ago to study tonight is compromised by the fact that the final decision rests upon me. I am absolutely free to refuse myself. The vertigo comes from the person at the edge of a cliff who doens't know if the person he or she will be in five minutes will decide to jump.
Unfortunately, I haven't solved the dilemma yet.
well I have no great philosophical insight, and to be honest motivation isn't too hard for me right now in my life, but you know I have had some rough times in the last few years (probably nothing to what you have experienced, but they felt pretty shit to me at the time) and I guess motivation was harder to come by then. I'm not sure how I stayed motivated. I guess it was pretty important not to lose my job, or how would I pay rent, so I got up and went to work everyday. I'm not saying I did my best work when I was there, but I continued to turn up, and eventually I started to feel better about life and back came my motivation to do things, especially social things.
Motivation now consists of little goals and rewards. Beside my computer at work I have photos from all my trips, they remind me why I go to work - to save enough to go to these exciting places. And if I just need to get through the day I promise myself a little reward when I get home, makes things easier. I used to do that when I was studying as well. Like, if I write 500 words of this essay then I get to go to the beach for the afternoon. Real short-term goals always work better than any long-term bigger picture stuff for me.
I don't really know what my point is here. But just know that motivation is something we all struggle to find sometimes. Sometimes all you can do is ride it out til it comes back. Even let yourself indulge in doing nothing for a little while if that helps. But don't beat yourself up over it.
[tic tac toe]
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